Monday, September 3, 2018

Happy Labor Day

Happy Labor Day to you and yours.  I am enjoying this three day weekend finishing up chores around the house, laundry, yard work, wash the dogs and getting ready for a new work week. 

We have completed three weeks of the school year, with 33 more weeks to go, but who is counting? :-)    I am finding my groove so to speak at work, the teachers I work with are also better utilizing me for the benefit of the students.  I do enjoy my job, and as the school year progresses, I think I will like it more and more.

But, that does not mean I am not looking for another job.  I have 10 years in the state retirement system, and I would like to increase my retirement income from the state.  To do that, I would need to seek employment in a higher paying position for at least 3 years.  The FRS. Florida State Retirement bases your retirement pay on your 3 highest years salary.  As a teacher assistant, my pay is not that significant.   Retirement is always in the back of my mind, isn't it?

The oldest son (39)  is changing jobs.  He called me Friday to let me know.  Reading between the lines, he was terminated from his position because he would not sign a paper regarding a dispute.  I know he has been struggling (mentally and emotionally) at work and in his personal life.  Well, he has been struggling a lot lately in general.  He will not go back to his doctor ( whom he says knows nothing) and get back on his anxiety meds.  When he did take the meds a couple of years ago, he was in good spirits, happy and able to deal with life.  Now that he is off the meds, he struggles and is defiant when it is suggested that he go back on them. 

As a mom, I hate to see him unhappy and struggling with his demons.  It weighs on me and I want to help....but I know that helping financially (which I am kinda already doing with letting him live in my parent's house at cost) is only enabling him.  When I sell the house, and he has to move, I wonder where he will go and if we will see or hear from him.  We probably will here and there, but he is the type to chose his friends as his "family" instead of his real family to hang out with.  That has been the case since he was a young boy.  Why would I think it would change now, I don't know.

When he is in these moods, he will always say, " This is just the cards I was dealt, and I will have to deal with it."  Ah... no, J..... It's the choices YOU made that put you in this place.  It is difficult for the whole family, we all want to spend time with him but it is not his choice. 

When do you say enough is enough?  Or, When do I say when enough is enough?

Enjoy your Holiday!  

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